Busy, Busy

I have resigned myself to the fact that life is in a new kind of pace for me. Relaxing evenings watching tv and cuddling with my husband are in short supply, and the weekends are not near as restful as they once were. I am not really complaining though. I just can't believe how crazy things have been and as I look at the weeks ahead I know that each week is just as full as the last if not more so.

We are getting so excited about the arrival of our son. We have just over 6 weeks till the big due date (although a slightly earlier than planned birthdate would not come unwelcome)! As we get closer to meeting our son I find myself dreaming of what our little guy will be like and how he will fit in our family. Every move Ransom makes sends me into day dreams about him and the person he will be... what will he look like? What kind of personality will he have? What will his first word be? How different will it feel to really be the mommy this time around, instead of just the nanny? I really just can't wait to meet him. Every night when I get up (at least 5 times to pee) I tell him that it is his fault, but he is worth every momment of lost sleep. I dream of the nights in the future when I will be getting up to snuggle and feed my sweet son, and it makes just a little bit easier.

Emotional doesn't even begin to describe me these days. I have never felt so many emotions streaming through my body at one time. I cry A LOT, but not always over the same emotion... one time it could be happiness, the next fear, the next anger, and the next exhaustion. I don't really feel totally in control of which emotion will overtake me at any given moment, but I pray that God will give me some control or my husband may kill me in the next 6+ weeks. Pray for me as I try to keep myself in check and pray especially for my husband, as he does not always know what hit him. Praise God that He is in the redeeming business, because I have definitely needed his redemption from myself lately. I continue to pray that He will give me the grace to finish this race strong. I want to honor Him in this proccess and I am pretty sure screaming and crying at my husband is not His idea of honoring.

I have doctors appointment on Thursday, so I will hopefully update again soon after that.